Sunday, October 5, 2008
I distinctly remember the day I had him..I was not overtly tensed, as he is my second child .Infact I was more concerned about the hampered routine of my first born, Toshali. I felt tired and cranky and dont know why I felt a bit guilty each time I looked at Toshali. It was shoshti..and the city was all geared up for the five days of festivity. I had my small suitcase packed and ready from days before and reached the nursing home at the pre appointed time without any hassle. That particular day when I kissed toshali while she left for school..the only thought that lingered..when she sees me next I will be shared..blame it on the hormonal overdrive or whatever else..sentimentality was at its peak for me!
Unlike Toshali, Soumya entered the world with a lot less effort from my side..guess he was rearing to go even then! Holding him, the first thought I had..hes so light..Tosh was just perfect! Yah comparisions start early!! As a rejoinder to my thought came his deep and stretched out breath..almost a rebuking sigh. The days of the Puja that year passed in a haze for me..I was kept busy trying to make sense of the sleeping and feeding patterns of my new born. I brought him home on Doshomi.
With Soumya I have had to unlearn all my parenting guidelines, none of the tried and tested formulas worked..He has made me realise first hand that each card you are dealt with is different, so play differently. Now I realise that with him around I have grown too as an individual, my mind is constantly stimulated in thinking of new approaches to deal with his pranks, his zest for life and his bullish energy has definitely rubbed on to me..and also I have come to know the joy of having a real good fight head on, crying hard as if the world would end and within 5 minutes picking up the pieces and not giving a damn..A child that refuses to obey easily, helps you to grow..
I look at him and search for Dad..at times he gives me a glance that takes my breath away with its obvious resemblance..and the next moment he is his own self..the search is futile and I have come to realise that the search is very unfair too..to love him for all that he is..without comparision either to my family or his sister, is his right. His identity is his own..like his pranks, his mischieveous smile, and his 'driving me up the wall language skills' hahaha but what the heck!! Thats the Soumya Card..and I will play him to the best of my ability..
This one is for my Bond..the handsomest hunk in town!!