Friday, July 16, 2010

Rants and chore coupons

I have always been a grocery list person but lately, I always forget to bring the damn list with me to the store. And by lately, I mean since 2006. So yesterday, I came up with the brilliant idea to text myself the list! I mean, hello? I carry my phone everywhere! How smart am I?

Woot!
I forgot to bring my cell phone with me to the store yesterday.

We now have 5 bags of cupcakes and no salt.

I need to learn not to sweat the small stuff.

So what if I broke down and consumed a tub of tiramisu for lunch yesterday, what’s the big deal if we own three cordless phones but yet I am forced to shout "CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW? WAIT, I’M MOVING INTO THE CLOSET. CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW?" into my cell phone because I can’t find any of them?

Is it any biggie that my kids, who never see eye to eye on anything, finally found common ground in that they’ve mutually agreed to spend their summer screaming at, bickering with, and hurling insults at each other instead of, say, swimming in the pool?

No big whoop.

I need to keep it in perspective.. because there's a light somewhere at the end of this tunnel..., I might be forgetful, I might be cranky, and silly and moody and ogreish most of the time..and yet there is a light at the end of this tunnel.

When I was a kid, I was rarely grounded. Not because I was an angel, but because my mother was smart enough to realize that if she grounded me, that meant I couldn’t go anywhere and would be stuck in the house 24/7. The same house in which she lived. So, instead of grounding, my mother opted to become a screamer and much like anything she sets her mind to, she excelled at it. Accompanying the screaming was the eyebrow arch.

As with so many of her other talents like gardening, cooking and general housekeeping, I did not inherit all of my mother’s aptitude when it came to discipline. I am genetically incapable of arching either one of my eyebrows without bond interrupting me to ask if I’m having a seizure.

I can, however, scream. Maybe not to my mother’s decibel level but enough so that the vocal chords straining out of my neck are probably on Google Earth somewhere. However, I hate screaming. It always results in a mammoth headache. my screams go in one ear, bounce around the skull for awhile and exit via the other out of sheer boredom. My kids have learned to wait until my lungs collapse at which time they emerge from their cocoons, spread their wings and fly about their merry way. So in addition to screaming, because giving that up would be akin to giving up natural instinct altogether, I resort to grounding. I find my kids’ “currency” and garnish their wages. Fortunately for me, the currency at the moment is the same for both of them, specifically time on the computer and time with friends. This makes it very convenient and saves me the hassle of being creative with respect to individual consequences. A good thing because when the blood is gushing around my head and my eyes are protruding three feet out of their sockets, I don’t feel much like being creative. However, if you all have lost your way through my rants, let me make it clear that this is not a rant post ..nor is this about my forgetfulness. This is about that light at the end of the tunnel. Remember..

Yah, so amidst all the forgetting and screaming and grounding, my 37th birthday dawned. I woke up bored, and fearful of that extra wrinkle I might encounter while brushing my teeth. I was indecisive about whether to make it a big deal at work and carry some pastries, I was not sure about why it was my birthday at all, again , so soon, after the last time. So, with such random things on my mind I came out of the bathroom and headed for my coffee. And then in a sudden flurry of activity..things changed.



If you have succeeded in reading through the handwriting, some of you would have realised, that this is a chore coupon book. Toshali made this for my birthday. She gets no pocket money and so this is what she gifted me. Priceless!! You all would have also realised that I love head massages..if its a bit of more information than required, please ignore it! And now after the overwhelming love that I felt for my daughter, I looked at Bond..and asked," So, what have you for momma?" He replied, "When I get pocket money, I will buy you a perfume." He hugged me and smiled and ran away with the coupon book to tick his siter off. He ensures till date that all the coupons are delivered and keeps time as his sister massages my head with warm oil!!

Life is amazing!

42 comments:

RGB said...

I guess the light at the end of the tunnel (the ray of hope) is what keeps us going, eh?! It was very thoughtful of your daughter to come up with such a priceless gift (she definitely thinks out-of-the-box!).

Sujatha said...

Can I trade a coupon for cleaning up the table after dinner for one of your head massage coupons? :D


--Sujatha (F-n-S)

Meira said...

Superb! Calls for another tiramisu :)
happy happy birthday :)

The Holy Lama said...

Happy Birthday and it seems you got the most priceless gift yet.:)

Arun Meethale Chirakkal said...

:) :) :) Belated B'day Wishes!

KParthasarathi said...

very enjoyable post.You write with natural wit and humour.Belated birthday wishes.

Unknown said...

i can just :) at this.

Neel said...

Hahaha..Pompy didi...Priceless..esp. abt the screaming and eyebrow arch...I have witnessed a few of them to..during our childhood times together..;)

Sonu K said...

"I can, however, scream. Maybe not to my mother’s decibel level but enough so that the vocal chords straining out of my neck are probably on Google Earth somewhere."

i liked the line...
and happy birthday to you didi...i guess its belated...

keep writing
:)

R. Ramesh said...

Belated B'day Wishes:) again missed a party...dunno when u will actuallly keep yr promise..:)

Destiny's child... said...

Happy birthday :)
And what a sweet gift from your daughter...I see a very creative girl in Toshali, isn't she?

Zuzana said...

I love the music in the background, how very different.;) Like your new look here too.;)
Happy belated birthday (was it recently), my birthday is in July too.;)
xoxo

indranil said...

:) :)

Aparna said...

This was the best gift ever, tops that bangle you never showed me.
I see the leg massage coupon has already been used. How many more massage and Bond watching coupons left? And you ate one full box of tiramisu for lunch? Just thinking about it gave me a few bulges... And I've perfected the screaming and eyebrow raising part too. Maybe kakimoni and I could compare notes.

Aparna Mishra said...

Nice post

Ire said...

Awesomely awesome! And that boy is smart! I had bought my mom a horrendous green nail paint...I like green, for her birthday. It made her so happy that she even wore it for a bit! [Money, of course, was given by her!]

Gymnast said...

Wow..that was such a thoughtful gift. Toshali is going to grow up to a lovely young lady.

You're so lucky to have a daughter like her.

Belated happy birthday to you!

Indrani said...

Belated Birthday Greetings to you! :)
I liked the coupon for gifts, the idea is catching up and kids and their parents. I wonder who got this novel idea first. Great post Sujata, enjoyed reading it.
The header shot is from Venice I guess.

sujata sengupta said...

@RGB Thanks yah light at the end of anytjing is worth egging on!

@Sujatha theres a coupon that says 'cleaning up of anything' guess you can take that! Long time..where have you been?

@Meira thanks

@The Holy Lama thanks

@Arun thanks

@Partha thanks, its always a pleasure to get a compliment from you.

@Purnima thanks keep smiling

@Neel hahahah sure you remember, kuttikaki and mom were trendsetters in the disciplining dept. and look at us...such bad eggs we turned out to be!

@Sonu thanks!

@Ramesh hahhaha thanks, hopefully soon.

@Destiny's child thanks! Yes shes creative.

@Zuzana thanks, its been long since i visited your page. But I love your blog and will visit soon. My birthday was on the 7th of july. when was yours?

@Indranil :):)

@Aparna you are just like mom as far as parenting foes..and I take after mejoma..will have to work on that genetics later!

@Aparna thanks

sujata sengupta said...

@Nikita your mom had courage hats off to her..green nail paint!!!

@Gymnast thanks, yes I am very lucky to have her.

@Indrani Its a great idea isnt it!! I guess it was some american who got it first..what with their addiction to chores! the header is Amsterdam.

Nona said...

Belated happy birthday! I like Toshali's (way of) gift(ing). :)

deeps said...

Forgetfulness is the mother of interesting inventions! :p

Sumandebray said...

Happy Birthday to you...
Nice cards and nice cards.
I am not sure why but reading through the post it made me think of parallel movies of yesteryears .... that leave a question in your mind ..
did I actually understand the viewpoint of the director.....

Cheers!

Suraj said...

Wow ! Toshali really deserves a gift from you for such creative thinking.Its a real priceless gift and i am sure Toshali will give you many more such moments...

Belated Birthday Wishes Super Blogger...

anilkurup59 said...

I ve been looking into your posts for quite some time now.Interesting posts.
It is the heart that gifts that must be seen and not the gift per se.

Pesto Sauce said...

Life is beautiful

R. Ramesh said...

hey S, how did u manage to climb so many floor in paris ya? me envious...ok, lemme go and have tea to celebrate your best health..

R. Ramesh said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
JD said...

Belated birthday wishes Sujata..

ZB said...

belated wishes....and i know howit feels, these gifts are priceless....you have lovely set of children....God bless to them. TC:)

sujata sengupta said...

@Nona thanks

@Deeps so true1

@SDR parallel lives, parallel thoughts!

@Suraj thanks

@anilkurup thanks, changed the font hope its ok now

@Pesto sauce yest it is.

@Ramesh I wonder abouth that..but I guess I just got a bit crazy that day!
you can mail me the details of the people at my office id. sujatas@deenarmedia.com

We are in need of freelance writers.

@JD thanks

@ZB thanks

Sujatha said...

Oops, you must have confused me with Sujatha of Blogpourri. She's been on hiatus.

I'm Sujatha of Fluff 'n' Stuff.

(Too Many Sujat(h)as....)

:)

eye-in-sty-in said...

Happy birthday to you... The coupons were a sweet gift.. very personal and touching :-) One lucky mom I say :-))

Bikram said...

Well i had a smile and laughed sometimes reading this .. (sorry) but it was funny. and awww your daughter did that Wondeful.. who said kids dont care .. see she cares :)

and what an idea sir ji...

And here bealted birthday wishes toooo...

Sandy said...

I love your latest post.. It reminds me so much of myself but you are so right on..We need to stop sweating the small stuff and look around for more important thing to focus on..LIKE LIFE..it seems to fly by.....

Vijay said...

excellent post ..sujatha..love your blog//pretty nice contents...helps to learn some thing for a non-native speaker ....attractive and cool article(rants and chore)makes u cool as like my cool blog

Unknown said...

That was so sweet, thoughtful, creative and original - all in that order - of Toshali. Enjoy the goodies and bless your stars. Toshali's going to go a long, long way, wish her all the best.

sujata sengupta said...

@sujatha yes, I realised it when i went over to your page. You are Welcome here.

@eye-in-sty-in thanks spike!

@Bikramjit thanks

@Sandy so true, we need to focus on the meaningful stuff..who knows when it all ends suddenly!

@Maubrey thanks

@joyeeta thanks dear.

radha said...

So lovely! Really priceless. And yes, our vocal chords really develop once the kids arrive. Till then I was known to be soft spoken. Not anymore!

R. Ramesh said...

hey thanks ya S..good to have come across u....keep up the cheers:)

sujata sengupta said...

@Radha thanks

@Ramesh Thanks, am following up on the CVs with my GM.

@Joven thanks

Reflections said...

Loved the post...daughters tht way are very thoughtful arent they...and oh sons too[he makes sure she delivers, right;-D]

p.s: If there were any matches held for screaming u'll have stiff competition from this side of town;-D