Sunday, March 8, 2009

A Woman, A Mom and then theres work as well...

Motherhood comes naturally. Working motherhood doesn't. The key of managing a baby and a career definitely lies in being organized. Easier said then done…but true none the less. Its better to be prepared for the upcoming challenges and equip ourselves with a plan than doing a repair job later in the day – There’s always going to be too much on the plate with a kid below a year at home and a rewarding job outside. The points below are oft repeated and clich├ęd by now and am sure many women are leading successful lives without any of these essentials.. but trust me.. its not bad to make life a bit easy..

Get an organizer. Any organizer. No matter what kind you use, from good old fashioned paper to software you installed on your laptop and be in charge of it.

Prioritize. An off site meeting with a client can probably be delegated to a colleague in case the toddler at home has gulped down a coin, in the same vein as teething problems of the child and the associated crankiness can be put on a back burner without guilt. Accepting that you cannot be everywhere at the same time giving your one hundred percent is essential. Accepting help graciously in any form does not need to have a guilt tag either.. as long as you return the favor.

A stressful day at work is often followed by a new set of tasks and demands when you get home. When your partner is looking for reinforcements and your children want your attention, a big 'head and heart' shift is needed. Thoughts about work can color the way you interact with your children and continue to distract you long after you have left work. This is natural and the child will have no memory of it as long as you don’t let the guilt get to you, so relax and smile. Once you get home, a ritual or routine can help to make the transition. This is a way of marking the physical, mental and emotional move from work to home, from worker to parent. It can be something as simple as changing out of work clothes, or switching your thoughts to your child as you go from work to home.

Talk to your partner and older children, if any, about the challenges of making the transition. This is likely to be helpful, especially during stressful times at work. Help them to see things from your perspective, try to see things from theirs, and have reasonable expectations. Expecting time to flop out on a chair and relax in front of the television as soon as you get home is probably not realistic!

Your expectations of yourself and of family life need to be realistic. It would be great if you were always able to leave your concerns behind and be the 'perfect' parent. It would also be great if children were always cheerful and concerned more about your well being than their own. Unfortunately, that's just not how things are. There will be times when the balance between work and family demands is 'upset'. For example, your child might be sick, you might be working night shifts, you might need to travel for work, or a project might require extra work or longer hours. Good strong family relationships can help you all withstand trying times. And remember, there is no universal formula for work-family balance. You, your situation and your relationship with your child are unique. You need to take into account your energy level, personality, and parenting style as well as your child's needs. Set reasonable standards for yourself with realistic expectations.

A happy woman makes the family happy..and a martyr just overloads the family with guilt.. enjoy womanhood and its blessings, live life to the fullest and remember its ok to leave your child with a care giver to attend a night long bitching session with other women..recharge yourself with whatever gives you pleasure, as your battery is the most used in the family!! HAPPY INTERNATIONAL WOMANS DAY!!